BA-BOOM

The ba-boom-ba-boom-ba-boom of my rapidly beating heart thumped me abruptly awake. Panic. Confusion. Fear. What was that noise? A gun-shot? Where am I? A shout....and I strain to search with sleepy eyes into the inky-dark of another world...a chocolate-skinned woman with a turbaned-head shaking a broom at a figure retreating backwards, who stumbles over a low stone wall, his hand raised, clutching something that clinks metallically as his hand comes down to stabilise himself on the wall..is that a gun? Where am I?

My racing heart slows with realisation....I'm safe. I'm in my bed up in the mountains above Positano....a long, long way from South Africa, my birth-place; a long way from being 'on-alert' all the time; a long way from Then....

....Now I walk freely, using my God-given limbs to move me. I climb almost 400 steps to reach the road above, or 1300 down to the centre of town, passing stalagtites - roughly-hewn columns seemingly supporting the limestone-mountain - and terraced groves of lemon-tree's .... I'm free! No gyms for me! No need for a stepping machine here.  No need for big walls, electric fences, security alarms and armed patrols either.  No need.

I love this about living here in Positano - it's an oasis contained by the mountains behind us and the sea in front...beyond lies another story...but here, although not untouched by modern-day evils, still exists a liberty to Be.

And to Be a part of this dreamscape is to wake up every morning with Pleasure, with Delight, with Thanks...that I can step out and Touch the World .. with Peace, with Love, with Joy.

"WHEN IN ROME DO AS THE ROMANS DO"...so the saying goes

Visitor's to our Amalfi Coast always ask what they should do about tipping in a restaurant, tipping the restroom clerk, how to greet someone they're introduced to in Italian and so on, so to help clear things up, here are a few pointers to keep in mind when next you come and visit La Bella Italia.

SALUTATIONS 

• Salve is 'Hello'. You pronounce the 'e' at the end as you would like the 'e' in 'elephant'. Ciao (pronounced 'Chow') is 'Hi' and isn't used between strangers.  When meeting or taking leave of someone, both friends and strangers greet each other by using Buon giorno (Good day) and Buona sera (Good evening). In Italy friends greet each other with a kiss on the cheeks, usually the left cheek first, then the right. Kissing on the lips is regarded as intimate and so is generally reserved for lovers. It is appropriate to shake hands with someone you meet for the first time. You can use 'Un piacere' for 'It's a pleasure to meet you';
• Use 'Per favore' or 'Per piacere' for 'Please'; 'Grazie' for 'Thank you' (pronounced 'gratziE' - the 'e' at the end is also pronounced); 'Prego' for 'A pleasure' or 'You're welcome'.

OUT AND ABOUT

• Use the word 'Permesso' (Permission) when you need to make your way through a crowd;

• Smoking is banned in public establishments - you'll need to step outside to light up your Marlboro;
• Drunkenness in public is frowned upon. Drinking for drinking's sake is also not well regarded and here an aperitivo (aperitif), whether it be a cocktail or glass of wine, is traditionally enjoyed with a meal. A drink will always be accompanied by a bowl of olives, peanuts, crisps - or all three!
• It is not considered good form to call a waiter from across the room - be polite and formal with waitering staff;
• The bill (il conto) will not be presented unless one asks for it;
• If you are enjoying yourself at a seaside town, like Positano, please cover yourself if you leave the beach to sit down at a restaurant, even a beach-front restaurant. It is not considered appropriate to sit at a restaurant table or at a bar in one's bikini or beach-shorts - it's disrespectful to other diners;
• Should you order a drink or something to eat at the counter and then decide to go to a table, it is the correct form for the waiter to bring these to the table for you - please don't do this yourself, however much you may yearn to put those past waitering skills to use!
• It is not common for Italians to share food from their plates - table manners are rather formal here - though should you love that pasta sauce so much that you just have to get the last bits of it up, please go ahead and do so with a piece of bread, as this is a sign of much appreciation for your meal! Just don't lick the plate!
• Spaghetti is eaten with a fork, not with a fork and spoon, though you will be forgiven if you aren't able to master the just-a-fork technique! 

• Be aware that when ordering fish in a restaurant, the price on the menu is per 100gm of fish, not for the whole fish, and this is weighed before cooking.  On average, a fish portion is 350gm;

• Cappuccino's are enjoyed in the morning, before lunch - cappuccino's go well with the pastries enjoyed for breakfast but don't combine well with lunch or dinner meals.  Espresso's are ordered after a meal, including dessert. Liqueurs (and here there are plenty to try: limoncello (lemon), finocchietto (fennel), mirtillo (wild blueberry), nocillo (walnut), fragola (strawberry), anice (liquorice) and many more) are enjoyed with dessert or in place of a dessert;
• It's polite to clean your table before you leave a self-service bar or cafè;
• Our common practice of asking for a 'doggie bag' to take home any leftovers for Fido, just doesn't cut it here;
• In general, restaurants include a cover charge per person (coperto), which is usually shown as the first item on the bill - it's a modest charge of around Euro 1.00 - 2.50  - except in chi-chi restaurantants or upmarket tourist destinations where it's likely to be more;
• Tipping (il servizio) is customary, though not expected, and is seen as appreciation of good service.  Leaving an amount of 10% - 15% of the value of the bill is appropriate and should be left in cash. You generally won't find a space on a credit card slip to include this. If the servizio is included at the bottom of the bill, no tip is necessary.  Leave Euro 0.50 or more for table service in cafè's, Euro 1.00 or more at hotel bars for a round of drinks or more; checkroom attendants Euro 1.00 per person and restroom attendants Euro 0.50 - expect to tip more in more upmarket establishments;
• Visa and Master Card credit cards are more commonly accepted than American Express, though cash is usually preferred;
• When you leave a restaurant, bar, even a gelateria, take your receipt and/or bill with you. It's to avoid any unnecessary ugliness should the Italian Guardia di Finanza (tax police) stop and ask to see proof of your payment.  They are allowed to approach you within a 100 yards of an establishment where you have eaten and ask for this.  If you haven't got it on you, you can be fined, as will the establishment owner for not providing one.  This is all in an endeavour to prevent tax evasion;
• Be sure to dress appropriately when visiting places of worship, of which there are many, in Italy. Churches are filled with wonderful art and sculpture to be openly admired and appreciated. Short shorts, mini skirts, sleeveless tops or tank-tops are a No-No in most churches throughout the country.  Carry a sweater or shawl with you, even during the summer, so that you can cover your shoulders before entering a church;
• Please don't take food into a church and refrain from sipping from your water bottle whilst inside - those sucking sounds are very off-putting when one is praying - please respect that others are here to worship;
• Please turn off mobile phones, or at least mute their ringtone;
• Please wait to enter a church until a service or private affair such as a baptism or wedding, is finished.

 There you go! This should help you not get any skew looks!  And practice that spaghetti-fork-twirling-action!